World Championship 2015
Master's report
1st day : Solving Open
The French have all screwed up but, Guy nonobstant, I'm just ahead of Michel. Ah? If the serious stuff starts tomorrow, I'm in trouble !!!
Clerk's note: as the Open issues are unpublished, it is not appropriate to publish them on a site, even a confidential one
2nd day : 1st part of World Championship 2015
Yeah, the blue line of the Vosges will be for another time. The first day of the championship was dismal. It must be said that when it takes 20 minutes to realise that a bNb2 can stop a wPc7 from being promoted by ...Nc4 (wK is on e8), one cannot expect miracles. I caught up with a mini-course of Saint-Lazare (1 hour): at the beginning there were 4 listeners, at the end 50. The person in charge of the rancid forum didn't see fit to mention it. A few neurons came back today, but the whole thing is not brilliant. I met Julia. I invited her to the course, only to realise immediately that it no longer existed. Anyway, I can't see her coming to France to the nique-ta-mère. The 16 year old Mongolian was 4th without a hand fault (Kb7 instead of Ka7) in the first 3-moves. I don't know what he did today but there is also the little brother coming. Meanwhile, the French team is back from the old people's home.
3rd day : 2nd part of World Championship 2015
Finally, I went from 50th place (last night) to 35th. The feat of the century, for sure. Michel is 12th. Our lamentable team, however, is ahead of the Batavians and Israel. Little consolation. Finally, the worst was avoided. A third of the team warmly congratulated Piorun. Gag of the day. Steinbriink steals half a point in the selfmate 3 moves because I wrote "idem" to avoid repeating the same 2 moves. I quote: "what is haïdeme, is it english?". Sic and resic. Section: Chess and illiteracy.
The final banquet
A connection failure prevented me from telling you the gags that have occurred since then. A gag about John Rice. More later. The main thing is, as always, the closing banquet. You know your master bucket, the so-called endgames specialist. And an expert in table strategy. . First good decision. The Marquis sits down next to Ward (actually Edward) Stoffelen, a French-speaking Belgian and Batavian speaker. With everyone else at the table speaking Batavian schmulblick, I know I won't need to gibber innegliche. I skip the 15 gags of the meal (a whole article would be needed) and get to the point. Edward is a long-time friend of Pervakov. The latter joins him with (noblesse oblige) a bottle of (Russian) vodka. Inevitably, the best composer in the world acts like a magnet. Then Martin Minski, a brilliant German and French composer, whom I had met the day before, arrived. I skip details of the conversation with him and his charming wife. After a few drinks, I thank Oleg and quote the great philosopher Elvis Presley : "take my advice, treat me nice". And so, of course, I play the only move. I beg the guests to excuse me for a moment, and run into town to buy a bottle of Polish vodka. On the way back, Edward pulled out his Belgian jenewer. But it's a woman's liquor. Phew! He won't break my blow with Oleg! But, as you can imagine, before joining Oleg, I make a diversion to Julia's table. But she is like Remy, non-drinker. Her bodyguard, Ketris (organizer of Jurmala 2008 and therefore, for me, benefactor of humanity) is obviously in detox and refuses my vodka too. Nevertheless, I give him my prepared text for Julia, the only composer since the 19th century and blah, blah, blah. Ketris laughs. Back to the main table. Oleg thanks me. The magnet continues to work, Costeff arrives. And a little later Afek. I realise that I have the 4 biggest current composers on my table (studies) except Didukh, Becker and the retired Gurgenidze (present in Ostroda).Afek tells Kortchnoi's anecdote about Gufeld. I tell him that I know it. Costeff replies that it is not authentic. I say to Costeff: "Like the one about Louis XIV, he never said "The State is me". He agrees, and replies: "Like Marie-Antoinette, she never said that if they don't have bread, they can only eat buns". At the time, I feel like kissing him, but on the one hand I am not a faggot, and on the other hand I have a reputation for being anti-Semitic. So let's be careful. There is a lot more to tell, especially about the mess I made.
But I have bad equipment
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